Side-effects

After starting the process of going down on my medication (Prednisone) I've started to experience the side-effects over the past few weeks. I guess it's more of how long I've been on it than how much I'm taking. Least fun: moodiness (more than usual that is). Though it may sound vain the side-effect that bothers me the most is the puffy "chipmunk" cheeks Prednisone is known for. Other people might not even notice it, but I do and it makes me really self-conscious and definitely doesn't help with the depression. It fluctuates too it seems, one day my checks can be really puffy and the next it's not that bad. I'm also having a hard time focusing and getting my work done among other things.

In other news:
Today's my birthday, I don't like birthdays. If you like me you won't tell me happy birthday. No one here knows it's my birthday, I'm glad. I made myself brownies. Jeremy is supposed to take me out tomorrow, maybe that will cheer me up.
Most unstructured paragraph ever.

I hate it here. Not the city, not the school so much (though it is quite unorganized), I hate living in the dorms. I having a hard time finding a job though, so getting my own apartment isn't an option. I'm vaguely considering transferring next semester, where to though? UCF? I definitely won't be staying in the dorms, I can't take it.

The Diagnosis

This is the post I've been putting off (well, really I've been putting a lot of things off lately), it's hard to talk about, and it's not a fun topic that's for sure. I'm sure some of you that have been following this blog are curious though and I know there are at least a few of you who really do care and I appreciate that. So while this isn't something I feel like talking about, I'm posting it because I need your support and your prayers. And who knows, maybe one day this can serve as a story of encouragement for someone in a similar situation.

Two weeks ago, I had to have a colonoscopy and endoscopy, not something you ever want to do, especially a week before moving 7 hours away from your family for college. The doctor tells me I have Crohn's disease. I knew they were going to find something wrong, because I've known something was wrong for a while, but it's still very depressing to know that this is something I'll have to deal with for the rest of my life and that pretty much right off the bat I'm on my own to deal with it because of leaving for school. It also makes this time of transition even more of one.

The meds I'm taking have the scariest possible side effects of anything I've ever taken. Thankfully, I've had no real problems so far and taking four horse pills with lunch and supper does get easier. Though figuring out the logistics for me, food, and meds to be in the same place at the same time can get difficult. They do seem to be helping though, so who knows, I could get lucky be blessed and be in remission for years.