No weigh! Just weight a minute!

A couple weeks ago the baby doctor told me I was fat. Well, maybe she didn't say that exactly, but that's how I took it at least.

The nice nurse or technician or whatever-she-is had me step on the scale and pushed the little metal thing, farther, and farther, and farther. Then she says, "hmmm, step off for a second. Okay, let's try that again. Yep, that was right." I'm thinking, "really?!?!?" at the number which I will not disclose to the reading public (all 15 of you), and want to say something about how I have been retaining a lot of water, so maybe that explains it, but I don't.


Photo from Flickr user publicenergy


So, we go back to the exam room that's always too hot or too cold (on our first visit we somehow got in a room that had a thermostat in it with a nice note that said, "feel free to adjust for your comfort." I've decided that room was a mirage, or a dream) and waited 5.4 billion hours for the doctor to come in and type on her laptop for 5 minutes.

My doctor is really nice and I had asked her about the weight gain on my last two appointments and she did not seem concerned. She just said "eat healthy," I knew she meant "eat healthily," but I did not point out her mistake. However, this time she said, "Well, we certainly don't want to see 10lbs of weight gain every month." Yes, 10*&%*&%&*%*$&lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I tried to explain that I had not been eating any more or any differently from previous months. She did also add that there could be something wrong with the scale; that someone else had complained about it earlier, but she did not offer to let me try one of their other scales. She advised that I just weigh myself at home and keep track of my gain.

So for the rest of that day and probably the next I was in an eating depression. "I can't have ice cream! The doctor said I was fat!!!" Shawn's mom had sent me some candy when Becky picked me up for our crochet group meeting, "I can't eat that, the doctor said I was fat!" Okay, so I did eat a kit-kat or two during the meeting, but in my defense, it was staring at me!

Shawn kept telling me, "you're not fat, you're pregnant." Good intentions, but not helping.

Whenever I explained the above doctor's visit story to anyone I made sure to include: "but she did say something could be wrong with the scale. Someone else had complained about it earlier." In all honestly I had very little hope in this statement, I was really thinking, "of course some fat heifer complained about being a fat heifer!" Anyway, we do not have a scale at home, so we decided to go to Target and buy one.

Side-note: I've been very disappointed in Target lately, items I depend upon them to have they no longer carry and have a similar item by their store brand instead. This does not make me buy their store brand, this makes me shop online instead. This visit brought a different kind of disappointment.

We find the end-cap of bathroom scales. The hanging one have no prices, the ones on the shelves bellow have prices but not a one seems to be in the right place. Shawn goes to look for one of the stores ever-convenient price scanners. Except that they're not so convenient when they've taken them all down! The service phone is also useless as no one answers or it's busy. There is also a lack of employees to help us, but mysteriously after I walk away and return an employee's cart has been place behind where I was standing. I think they were hiding from us. So I make a decision (shocking, I know), "lets take one of each to the electronics counter and have them check the prices." Shawn, "seriously?" "Yes." So we did, or he did, I just walked along. Most of the scales ended up being completely different prices than any of the signage by the way.

We get home and I weigh myself, "Ah ha! See, I knew I didn't weight that much, and this is at night time, the doctor weighed me in the morning and you always weigh less in the morning!" The next morning I weigh myself again, almost 7lbs less than that dumb scale at the doctor's office. So, of course I call/text everyone I know and tell them.

It has now been over two weeks since that doctor's visit and every time I weigh myself I have an urge to call the doctor's office and tell them I'm still not up to that weight that their stupid scale said I was. I am not a fat heifer!